Monday. Bad day.

I reached my workplace this morning.

I searched for my locker key.

I searched for my locker key again.

I searched for my locker key again and again.

And was stunned to find it gone.

I didn’t take it out from my bag. But somehow I dropped it.

Damn. Had to get the spare key from office to open my locker. And now had to go make another key.

What a way to start a Monday at 6.45am by making me so gan jiong early in the morning when I was just half awake.

Next incident.

Me and Jeremy were talking crap during lunch at the canteen when my mum called. 

Mum:
Hey. Are you ok?

Me: 
What? I’m working.

Mum:
You got a friend by the name of Ryan?

Me:
No. Why?

Mum:
Because he called home and was crying and said he’s going to be beaten up.

Me:
Chey. And you thought it was me? Excuse me? I kena beaten up? Probability I beat people up is higher lor.

Later Jeremy learnt of this. And he actually said whoever kena beaten up was power. Can even call home while beaten up.

But still stupid lah. Call for mama’s help still can call wrong number.

I think he deserves to be beaten up.

Edit @ 11.10pm, 31 March 2008:

Damn. The locksmith is closed.

Monday. Really a bad day.

Ah well. I’m quitting soon. I shall tender my resignation tomorrow.

They should hire me as Marketing Director.

I was sleeping when Miss Lim Shi Ying woke me up.

Hey. It seems like she likes to wake me up whenever I’m sleeping.

But anyway, I was semi-awake and was just lazing on the bed listening to the birthday celebration of the 933 chart when the trademark sound of msn sounded on my speakers.

I decided to crawl over to the computer and that was when she asked me about Top One KTV.

Actually, she wasn’t the 1st person to ask me about Top One KTV.

There were 3 or 4 people before her asking me about it. And the thing is, I don’t know them.

Ok. You guys should really check that Top One KTV out. It is really a nice place.

And Miss Lim Shi Ying was saying something like my blog was the 1st 3 search results on Yahoo for Top One KTV.

I’ve checked.

Wah seh!

It is top lor.

And this is also how people get to my blog.

 

Yes. Miss Lim Shi Ying was right after all.

My blog.

Mai siao siao. High readership/viewership.

Wah seh. I really feel like I’m famous.

But I was wondering which idiot searched for Manchester United sucks and how dare he comes to my blog.

Ta ma de

Look! If Manchester United sucks, what makes Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool?

They suck more. Let me ask you, who is currently top in the English Premier League table?

If the 1st place sucks, the rest are needless to say.

Anyway, I would like to thank whoever that gives me support throughout these days when sometimes I find that I have run out of things to blog about.

Ya right.

I swear to hunt down that idiot who came to my blog by searching for Manchester United sucks.

And I’ve checked also. Usually my Top One post will be the most read post ever.

They should just hire me as their Marketing Director. Their TV advertisement is simply too cannot make it.

Or maybe they should just pay me to be their endorser.

Edit @ 5.17pm, 1 April 2008:

To Charlott.

Top One was nice lah. Maybe because the staff never really disturbed us. But they came quite promptly when we called for them.

I find that they are too China already. Perhaps some people find they suck. They suck to some extent lah. I still can tahan.

I don’t really find it a good place to host a party. Seriously, the place is weird for a party. But it is good for maybe 4 or 5 people to hang around and sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (if they have that song).

To Miss Lim Shi Ying.

*coughs

I notice that I’m always bragging to you whenever I reply to your comments.

However, as I continue to investigate to all my brags to your comments, I concluded that actually all those crap which I replied aren’t really crap. They sound like crap but they are actually facts.

You have no choice but to agree with me even though they sound like crap.

Hmm. Interesting huh?

Yup. I know you click my blog through your blog. I can see it.

Admit it. My blog is zai. That’s why you click and click and can never get tired of clicking it.

I kind of regret promising you an upthrust post on your birthday.

Because I don’t know what to write.

The 6th 21st birthday party. EP.

Finally I got the pictures I needed to come up with this.

And regarding this statement…

wanna thank bulu for linking her blog on his blog de 诗莹

cos alot of ppl visited here from his place la. lol

Make me the Marketing Director of your blog.

Muahaha.

This shows that many people read my blog.

I’m so touched.

This blog is strictly worth reading.

Because the producer and director of this blog is talented and zai.

I mean, who else blogs in a way like me?

This, in short, is the extremely rare 萧氏风格 of blogging.

The 6th 21st birthday party.

Yes. I went to Miss Lim Shi Ying’s birthday party yesterday in my $150 Ryan Giggs’ jersey.

That was my most expensive jersey ever.

Mr Poon was very on time. In fact he was the first one to reach.

And there he was alone with Miss Lim Shi Ying and her family and relatives and he felt very awkward.

He called Jeremy and me to told us to hurry up and come.

I guess I need to study the Singapore Street Directory more.

I have guided the wrong road directions to Kavin and Mr Poon.

And Mr Poon’s 10 points in driving was questionable.

But never mind. It was my fault when he went through the first underpass.

But it wasn’t my fault when he went through the 2nd underpass and almost went to AYE.

And while we were in Shi Ying’s Kangoo with Mr Poon on the wheels, one bastard taxi driver suddenly cut into our lane.

Almost buanged. By the way, the Kangoo’s horns couldn’t work properly.

Ended up me and Jeremy who were behind flew to the front and hit the seats.

Damn that cab driver.

And Jasmine is learning driving too. But auto car.

So let’s just get a manual car everytime we go out so that she can’t drive.

*evil grin

As for me. I seriously think I will fail my 1st test. The way I drive. Too garang already.

Will be something like how Ah Ker and Augustine drives.

Shi Ying was a good host. Can tell she was busy.

Nah. You were not rude. Other than the part where you woke me up twice at 2.05am and 2.30am while I was sleeping soundly dreaming of Erika Toda when 2 smses from you came. But I continued my dream 1 minute later. So it’s ok.

Please buy 0546 today for 4D. She drew the 4 numbers.

Like I care sia. Manchester United won 4-0. That is what I care. Ronaldo and Tevez scored one each. Rooney scored 2 goals.

0546. She mentioned if win already must treat her or get her something.

Do you think I care?

I actually have a better idea.

0546. Buy. If win, keep quiet. Don’t tell anyone. If she asks, just say forget to buy.

And since I gave you this idea of keeping your earnings by shutting up your mouth if you win, treat me one bottle of Pokka Green Tea will do.

However, if you really win big, treat me one carton of Pokka Green Tea will do.

If you win millions, buy that Pokka Green Tea factory for me.

Jeremy left early as he had another birthday party going on.

But the party over the other side ended 5 minutes after he reached. So he failed to dunk whoever he wanted to dunk.

So Miss Lim Shi Ying, how’s the Guess wallet and the Mango bag?

She must have loads to blog about later on.

I know no whipped cream for you. No satay sauce for you. Must be mocking at how I fail to plan all this. There will surely be a chance. We shall see.

My birthday is not over yet.

Muahaha.

Yup. She almost tore my $150 Giggs’ jersey when I insisted on going home alone.

A Mitsubishi Colt seriously can’t fit in 7 people lah.

So let’s just sacrifice myself for a more comfortable ride home for the rest of the 6 people ya?

It is just me lah. I’m always self-sacrifical.

I’m still waiting for pictures to be sent to me. Or maybe I steal from your blog. I think it’ll be better.

Suxian sent me 2 pictures while we were arguing whether she’s smart or I’m smarter.

Conclusion. I’m smarter. I usually outwit people. Just that I like to act blur only. Because by acting blur, I can outwit people more easily.

Another reason why I’m smarter. I actually remember her birthday and she doesn’t know mine. And she was asking who’s birthday is the next.

Thanks huh.

Suxian was a victim of mine last night. Shi Ying is always a victim of mine. Seriously. Both really thought I walked home last night.

Such cute and innocent girls.

I know I have marched 24km with Full Battle Order during BMT.

But then hor. To sweat in my $150 Giggs’ jersey is seriously a bad idea.

Thanks for being so concerned anyway.

Well. Send me pictures and I’ll have work to do.

I’ll not forget my promise to Miss Lim Shi Ying.

Upthrust post on 2nd April.

Must rack my brains on how to write that post.

Edit @ 7.06pm, 30 March 2008:

So 0546 or 5640 6540 5604 or whatever combinations you can think of didn’t come up in today’s 4D.

Let’s just forget it lah hor?

Miss Lim Shi Ying must be disappointed.

There goes all her extra treats, presents and a potential car.

I touched up on this.

I’ve added many many more stuff in this slide.

Check this out.

| View Show | Create Your Own

You can find this at the About the Producer page as well.

Still waiting for Miss Lim Shi Ying to send me her birthday photos.

I have decided.

I have decided.

My crazy cycling regime shall resume with effect from today.

Provided it doesn’t rain.

Or else what were you thinking about what I have decided?

Edit @ 1.13pm, 30 March 2008:

I badly want to cycle.

But the weather doesn’t want to compromise with me.

Damn.

Grrr.

Oh well. I just have to watch Secret the 8th time.

Jay Chou teaches beatbox.

OMG!!! This is so cool.

After the impressive performance by Sugianto, I went on to search for some beatbox stuff.

He should have done that in his concert.

So it is confirmed.

He really is a big joker.

He is probably the biggest joker ever.

Introducing…

Yes. Javier Mascherano.

Seriously, this is what he says according to The Straits Times yesterday.

I do not know why I was sent off. I did not swear, I was not aggressive and I did not confront him. All I did was ask him what was happening, nothing else.

HUH?!!!

见鬼啦！

It is pretty obvious in front of billions of fans watching that you mouthed the words ‘f**k off’ and wanted to fight. And you had to get Steven Gerrard and Rafa Benitez to calm you down.

I clearly remember Stevie G held your head to his face, stared at you and told you to shut up and leave the pitch.

To rephrase it in what you might say, Stevie G told you to f**k off from the pitch since that was the referee’s wish.

You mouthed the words ‘f**k off’ and you said you didn’t swear? Excuse me?

Then what were you doing? Beatboxing or farting ah?

You refused to leave the pitch after being sent off.

Moreover, it was Fernando Torres who was booked, and why should you walk all the way from one end of the pitch to specially go and argue with the referee?

And isn’t that called confronting the referee?

I think your command of English is lousy. Kindly please consider to join Miss Betty Lee’s English class and do more essays and comprehensions. Your first assignment will be an essay titled ‘My red card’.

After you graduate from Miss Betty Lee’s class, please move on to join Miss Chew Siang Jiun in her GP class. I think your English will improve by leaps and bounds then. Perhaps you’ll understand the meaning of some chim chim words really well.

And if you want to swear, don’t use the f word. It is not nice.

Use a better sounding word like copulate. Which sounds more professional and learned and has the same meaning which what you imply with the f word you like to use just like Kavin Aw.

It seems like you didn’t know where you are wrong. I think you are an idiot.

Happy birthdays to all.

So yesterday marks the 21st birthdays of 2 of my female friends.

Happy birthday to Yingwen!
Happy birthday to Hazel!

And today marks the 21st birthday of the all-time Lobocop.

Happy birthday to Jeremy!

I guess he’ll be having fun with his girl girl Mdm Pang later on.

So to all 3 people, who are currently all attached.

Eh. When getting married?

Muahaha.

蜻蜓的故事

在一个非常宁静而美丽的小城，有一对非常恩爱的恋人，他们每天都去海边看日出，晚上去海边送夕阳，每个见过他们的人都向他们投来羡慕的目光。

可是有一天，在一场车祸中，女孩不幸受了重伤，她静静地躺在医院的病床上，几天几夜都没有醒过来。白天，男孩就守在床前不停地呼唤毫无知觉的恋人；晚上，他就跑到小城的教堂里向上帝祷告，他已经哭干了眼泪。

一个月过去了，女孩仍然昏睡着，而男孩早已憔悴不堪了，但他仍苦苦地支撑着。终于有一天，上帝被这个痴情的男孩感动了。于是他决定给这个执着的男孩一个例外。上帝问他：“你愿意用自己的生命作为交换吗？”男孩毫不犹豫地回答：“我愿意！”上帝说：“那好吧，我可以让你的恋人很快醒过来，但你要答应化作三年的蜻蜓，你愿意吗？”男孩听了，还是坚定地回答道：“我愿意！”

天亮了，男孩已经变成了一只漂亮的蜻蜓，他告别了上帝便匆匆地飞到了医院。女孩真的醒了，而且她还在跟身旁的一位医生交谈着什么，可惜他听不到。

几天后，女孩便康复出院了，但是她并不快乐。她四处打听着男孩的下落，但没有人知道男孩究竟去了哪里。女孩整天不停地寻找着，然而早已化身成蜻蜓的男孩却无时无刻不围绕在她身边，只是他不会呼喊，不会拥抱，他只能默默地承受着她的视而不见。夏天过去了，秋天的凉风吹落了树叶，蜻蜓不得不离开这里。于是他最后一次飞落在女孩的肩上。他想用自己的翅膀抚摸她的脸，用细小的嘴来亲吻她的额头，然而他弱小的身体还是不足以被她发现。

转眼间，春天来了，蜻蜓迫不及待地飞回来寻找自己的恋人。然而，她那熟悉的身影旁站着一个高大而英俊的男人，那一刹那，蜻蜓几乎快从半空中坠落下来。人们讲起车祸后女孩病得多么的严重，描述着那名男医生有多么的善良、可爱，还描述着他们的爱情有多么的理所当然，当然也描述了女孩已经快乐如从前。

蜻蜓伤心极了，在接下来的几天中，他常常会看到那个男人带着自己的恋人在海边看日出，晚上又在海边看日落，而他自己除了偶尔能停落在她的肩上以外，什么也做不了。

这一年的夏天特别长，蜻蜓每天痛苦地低飞着，他已经没有勇气接近自己昔日的恋人。她和那男人之间的喃喃细语，他和她快乐的笑声，都令他窒息。

第三年的夏天，蜻蜓已不再常常去看望自己的恋人了。她的肩被男医生轻拥着，脸被男医生轻轻地吻着，根本没有时间去留意一只伤心的蜻蜓，更没有心情去怀念过去。

上帝约定的三年期限很快就要到了。就在最后一天，蜻蜓昔日的恋人跟那个男医生举行了婚礼。

蜻蜓悄悄地飞进教堂，落在上帝的肩膀上，他听到下面的恋人对上帝发誓说：我愿意！他看着那个男医生把戒指戴到昔日恋人的手上，然后看着他们甜蜜地亲吻着。蜻蜓流下了伤心的泪水。

上帝叹息着：“你后悔了吗？”蜻蜓擦干了眼泪：“没有！”上帝又带着一丝愉悦说：“那么，明天你就可以变回你自己了。”蜻蜓摇了摇头：“就让我做一辈子蜻蜓吧……”

有些缘分是注定要失去的，有些缘分是永远不会有好结果的。爱一个人不一定要拥有，但拥有一个人就一定要好好去爱他。你的肩上有蜻蜓吗？